A Review
Posted by themasonSo I haven’t seen Punisher: War Zone, but I’m going to review it anyways.
First of all, it stars Ray Stevenson (King Arthur, Life Line and plenty of other movies I’ve never freakin’ heard of). Now I got nothin’ against Ray, except for one thing: He ain’t Thomas Jane. Now, don’t get me wrong, Thomas Jane’s Punisher movie sucked balls, but he was great in it. It’s one of those bad movies that, for some reason, you like watching. Punisher: War Zone is NOT one of those bad movies you like watching. It’s one of those bad movies you don’t watch. Because it’s bad. And doesn’t have any redeeming qualities. Like Thomas Jane.
Look, I made a picture!
Ain’t it the bees knees?
Now, looking at IMDB I noticed that The Punisher has only a 6.4 rating and that Punisher: War Zone has a whopping 6.9. How can this be? How can War Zone be better than the Punisher. Well, it’s not. Everyone who actually rates shit on IMDB is a retard, everyone knows that.
The action scenes in War Zone are almost redeeming - except they’re boring. Had they a littlemore spiz in there zazz, making it spizzazz, this movie would be a whole lot better. It has no spiz though.
All in all, don’t bother paying for a movie ticket. Sneak into the theatre, the theatre’s don’t mind since it’s the studios your screwing. Rent it if you want to wait.
